Selfish Needs
by Stephycats7785
Summary: Leah and Edward have and affair and Leah wants out. "You don't love me." Her statement was spoken with such conviction almosting convincing me she had the ability to know what I was feeling instead of I being the one who knew what my emotions really were.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Selfish Needs

Pairing: Leah/Edward (Leaward)

Rating: T

Summary: Leah and Edward are having an affair and when she tries to leave Edward uses blackmail. Will Leah crumble to his wishes or stay strong and free herself from his selfish needs?

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from Twilight!

_Stranded in this spooky town  
Stoplights are swaying and the phone lines are down  
This floor is crackling cold, she took my heart, I think she took my soul  
With the moon I run far from the carnage of the fiery sun_

Driven by the strangle of vein showing no mercy I do it again,  
Open up your eye, you keep on crying baby, I?ll bleed you dry  
Skies they blink at me, I see a storm bubbling up from the sea

And it's coming closer  
And it's coming closer

You shimmy shook my bone leaving me stranded all in love on my own  
Do you think of me? Where am I now? Baby where do I sleep?  
Feel so good but I'm old, 2000 years of chasing's taking its toll

And it's coming closer  
And it's coming closer  
And it's coming closer  
And it's coming closer

_Closer- Kings Of Leon_

"You don't love me." Her statement was spoken with such conviction almosting convincing me she had the ability to know what I was feeling instead of I being the one who knew what my emotions really were.

"I _do _love you! How can you stand there spouting such lies when you _know _the truth." I shook my head adamant in my denial of her words.

Golden eyes locked with her dark almond orbs. Eyes that tell you so much about her if you ever got lucky enough for her to trust you enough to let you in. Eyes which could look into your very soul and tear your heart out when she shot you with one of her deadly malicious glares.

The conviction that colored her tone didn't lessen in sincerity as she replied. "Then I don't love you. Not anymore and never will I ever love you again. It's _over _and you are just going to have to accept it. Move on with your stupid fairytale life. Run back to your adoring little wife and precious baby daughter."

A sneer twisted her face into an ugly mask of jealousy and anger. The same mask she had worn for years. One I fear will never come off. Oh how I wish I could be the one to bring her out of the darkness and into the light. I wished I could free her of this tainted darkness slowly consuming her soul.

I still beleived with all my heart I could be the one to take away her bitterness and heartache if only she let me. Deep down a part of me knows she will never let anyone in but I cannot accept that knowledge. Another part in the back of my mind screams in unyielding fury I am the reason she could never move on to better times. The voice informed me I was holding her back and yet I could not find it within myself to set her free.

I doubt that I'll ever be able to gather the strength it would take to unbound her from the heavy chains which bound us together. Even if I could allow her the freedom she craved, I did not _want _to do so. I had always been a selfish creatures and now I'd finally gotten a taste of real love and passion with her, I would be damned if I would allow it to slip from my grasp after taking so long to find it in the first place.

"Seek comfort in the arms of your loving family who all believe you can do no wrong." I noticed she shifted when saying this. She couldn't seem to hold still and that always alerted me to the fact she had begun to feel nervous and on edge. I knew then I still had a shot of swaying her mind to change and making her stay here with me.

"You have e_verything _when some people have _nothing_. Why do you feel the need to ask for more than what you've already got? Can't you simply be happy and content with your life even if I am not in it? _Why _must you have _everything _you want even if it will only hurt me in the future? Do you hate me so fiercly you want to watch my torture stretch on and on?" The eyes of my secret lover filled with pain and I felt it stab into my heart like a thousand knives dipped in acid.

Why did she feel it nessasary to phrase it in such a way? How could she beleive I ever hated her after everything we've been through? She had to see how much I loved her. I would do anything for the girl standing in front of me. Correction, I would do anything _except_ the one thing she truly wanted of me.

I reached my pale dead hand out to rest on her shoulder. The movement seemed to slow and I wondered if some how time was begining to freeze. The sweet burn her skin sent pulsing through my dead cold flesh was a relief. Almost like someone had restarted my heart with a defibulator, the shock was that intensely strong.

My thumb trailed along the bare russett flesh of her collarbone. I could feel the shiver she gave cause my own body to tremble. I still had a chance and I couldn't fail. If she didn't change her mind on her own I would have to go to drastic means and I would if it ment I could keep her in my life. Let's hope she did not make me go as far as those lengths I was willing to go.

"You _know_ why I can't leave you _**Leah**_." I rolled my tongue and purred her name. It earned me another shiver from my lover. I took the oppurtunity to slide behind her and wrap an arm around her waist as I positioned my lips beside her ear so that each time I would speak my lips brushed against the shell of her ear.

"I know we never ment for this to tumble out of control but for some reason it did _exactly_ that. You _can't _leave me Leah. Not if you really ever loved me. You may say the words stating you don't care anymore but I can feel it's a lie when we are together." I placed a cold kiss below her ear. "When I touch you. When I taste you and especially when I am _in _you I can feel how much you love me. It's also how I know you will never really leave."

Leah stepped away from me even though her mind was screaming to stay. She turned to send me one last look of..love? Longing maybe? "Don't pull all this love crap on me leech. You do not really care for me. You want me to satisfy the sexual needs your undead _wife _can't seem to. That's not love leech. It is lust pure and simple. Nothing to do with the heart and everything to do with chemicals in the body."

Her lips parted and she hissed. "If you truly loved me as you claim to then you would want what is best for me even if it hurt you. Since you obviously cannot let me be free it tells me how little you care." Leah took a step towards the door. "_Goodbye _Edward Cullen. I'm sure it won't take you long to find another woman you can bewitch into being with you. I pray with all my soul the next girl can get free before she ends up like me."

When she reached the door panic clouded my thoughts. She couldn't leave! She may think I only wanted her for sex but she was _wrong_. I loved her and that happened to be the real reason I wanted her to stay. I had to make her stay so I could find a way to prove my love to her. When the knob turned and she began to pull it open I blurted out the only thing I could of which could cause her to rethink her actions.

"If you walk out the door I swear I will go to the Volturi!" When she turned around after letting her grasp on the door handle to loosen with her mouth hanging open in shock I knew I'd managed to catch her attention. It was a start atleast.

TBC..

**AN: This is going to be a two-shot and the next chapter is Leah's pov. What will she choose? Will she believe him or will she leave for her own sanity? In advanced warning this isn't going to have a completely happy ending. Well one of the characters will get what they want but not the other so it's kind of angsty.**

**I am in Boston having some medical tests done and this came to while listening to Closer by Kings of Leon. Please R&R like always!**


	2. No other choice

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything from Twilight!**

_"__If you walk out the door I swear I will go to the Volturi!" _When I heard the leech state those words my hand fell from the handle on the door.

I turned around to stare at him in obvious disbeleif. He wouldn't dare would he? He had to be bluffing. The parasite wanted to trick me into sticking around so he could continue to ruin my life with his presence. He really had to hate me if he would sink to such depth's and deception to convince me otherwise.

Could I really blame him for wanting to make my life hell? I had been the one to start this little affair after all. I never ment for it to happen but things just took a turn in that direction. Ever since Jake imprinted on the spawn, Edward Cullen had tried being friendly to me for the sake of Jacob.

I had been cold and unresponsive to his efforts. I hadn't wanted or needed a friend of the undead variety. Still the stupid leech would not take the hint and leave me alone. The more I pushed him away the more fustrated he became by my response until one day it exploded back into my face. If I had the power to do so, I would take back everything I had said and done to cause what happened next to occure.

**Past- Two Years Ago**

It started off like any other day with me in the woods by the Cullen household. I liked to be near incase Jacob had need for me and that was rare. He was to buisy with Bella and Edward's half thing. Jake didn't need me anymore but I liked to lie to myself and think otherwise. All I had wanted was for someone to need me so that I would not be left in the past.

So there I lay in the woods staring up at the sky and feeling sorry for myself when I heard a branch snap. I hadn't even bothered to lift my head since the sickening sweet smell told me who had interrupted my alone time.

"Go play with the wife Cullen. I am in no mood for your 'I wanna be friends' bullshit today." I spoke the words without looking at him.

Maybe if I pretended he didn't exist he would go away and leave me alone with the torture my thoughts brought. The pain was a good reminder as to why it's a bad idea to get close to people. If you don't get close then you can't get hurt.

A velvety voice penetrated the silence and my heart sped up once I heard it. I think it was a reflex or something because I hated Cullen and yet every time he spoke my heart raced. It must be part of the leech's dazzle me powers. I took a small comfort in knowing it wasn't love or lust which made my heart race. I didn't want to end up pining for a guy who was taken. Been there done that and I did not need a repeat performance thank you very much.

"Why won't atleast try to be cival with me? I know you are lonely and need a friend. I can be that if only you'd let me. Instead you push me away and hurl insults in my direction. I have done nothing than try to be your friend and you treat me like I am the enemy." I could hear him sigh and I knew he wanted an answer.

I was feeling half tempted to ignore him but when I thought about it I realized he had all the time in the world and could wait alot longer than I could. Using my elbows I pushed myself into a half sitting position and glared at the bloodsucker hoping he would flee like most people did. Unfortunately for me he did no such thing.

"News flash leech, we _are _enemies. Your a vampire and I am a werewolf. Two things which should never be mixed together. If you want a werewolf as a friend call my little brother. He doesn't seem to mind being friends with serial killers and that's what you are and always will be even if your trying to change." I made sure to bare my teeth and growl. Why wouldn't he just go away?

The stupid mind rapist had the nerve to sit on the ground next to me. We were almost touching and I cringed in disgust when I felt the cold tempeture of his body. He stared at me with his dead golden eyes. How could something dead have such lively eyes? It shouldn't be possible.

"You choose to judge me because of past deeds? If it works in a way such as that I should still hate you for the way you treated Bella when she was pregnant." His expression was bemused and it ticked me off even more.

"Then good. Hate me if you want. Trust me it's no skin off my back." When I shrugged his eyes darkened. I raised my eyebrow to show him I was unimpressed with his palor trick.

A pale hand ran through his bronzed hair. I bet Bella loved it whenever he pulled this move. Lots of girls would fall victim to such a boyish acts. Not me though. I did not fall for guys like Edward Cullen. If he had been trying to catch my attention he needed to try harder.

"Why do you do that?" Goldens blinked at me and I sighed. What was he babbling about? He must've been reading my mind because he answered my thoughts. "You act as if you don't care about anything when I know you do. Why can't you admit the truth."

I scoffed and rolled my eyes. "What truth would that be oh wise leech?"

"You find me interesting." He smirked as I narrowed my eyes. "I can read your thoughts remember? I know you wonder why I want to get to know you when everyone else could care less. I know you don't really hate me but you lie to yourself because you don't want to not hate me."

Scowling I rose to my feet and started to stomp off. When a cold hand grabbed onto my arm I whirled around and punched Edward 'mind rapist' Cullen right in the face. I could feel atleast three of my knuckles shatter on impact but I didn't flinch or cry out. Instead I went to hit him again but he caught my arm.

"What the fuck do you care?" I bellowed trying to get my arm back from him. "Do you have this obsession where you need everyone to think your perfect or something? Get it through your head leech, I don't want to be friends. The only reason I talk to you is because I do not want to hear it from Jake if I am rude in front of his perfect imprint. I do not like you. I don't want to be friends, I don't want to talk, I don't want to socialize like human beings. End of story goodbye and good night!"

I tried to walk away but he had my arm and I could not pull free no matter how hard I tried. "God! Just let me be parasite! Fuck off!"

**End Flashback**

He hadn't backed off though. He had kissed my broken knuckles to soothe them even as I screamed and fought and clawed at him. He held me as I hit him until my arms had become tired. He had kissed my face, my jaw, and down my neck. His velvet voice whispering sweet nothings I didn't want to hear as he fucked me.

He would later tell me it wasn't fucking but actually making love and I let him beleive it as long as he kept doing it and driving away Sam's face from my memory. The leech always felt the need to say he loved me and never once did I say it back. He wasn't angry about that because he assured me my mind told him everything he needed to know. I didn't care what he thought he caught from my mind. As long I as I knew I hated him he could continue on with his delusions.

Many nights I lay awake wondering if he really fancied himself in love me or if it was just wishful thinking on his part. Maybe he needed someone to love him the way his wife seemed unable to. I knew from talking with the leech that his marriage wasn't a very happy place anymore, not that I cared. Bella is always pushing him to do things he doesn't have interest in doing. I also knew they hadn't been together sexually in over a year. I did not ask why because I did not want to know what went on in the vampire couples bedroom.

I had let our affair go on for far to long and it was high time I ended it. I had known he wouldn't be happy but I wasn't doing this for him. I wanted to get out for my own sanity. I could not do this anymore. I'm so tired of hiding as if I am a dirty secret in the bloodsuckers laundry basket.

I wanted to find someone I could be out in the open with and not have to worry about what people thought. I wanted someone I could love without feeling shame for being in love. I deserved to find happiness right? Why could everyone else find love with the perfect person except for me? Why was I the odd one out? Me, Leah Clearwater happened to be the one extra peice to an already finished jigsaw puzzle.

I almost escaped to until he had to open his mouth and threaten to kill himself. He could not let me be happy could he? He had a wife and a daughter who would happily do anything to please him. So what if Bella couldn't get a rise out of him in their bedroom?

All he had to do was close his eyes and imagine someone else. I would know since I did all the time when I had been with Sam. I would imagine anyone from Jacob and Paul to Orlando Bloom or Leonardo Dicaprio. It did not really matter as long as Sam had thought I was thinking of him. It could work for the leech to as long as he never let his little dead wife know the truth. Let her be happy living with a lie. A lie was better than nothing at all.

"Your bluffing leech." I gave him a cold stare. I looked into his golden eyes hoping to find his words to be nothing other than a lie.

I may not like Isabitch and the Loch Ness monster but I wasn't so cruel to the point where I would want to take a husband and father from them. Maybe Edward knew this and he was using it to his advantage. He would sink to any means possible to get what he wanted. He wasn't used to not having everything he desired. Edward Cullen was nothing more than a spoiled brat who would live forever.

The mind reading leech wasn't to being told no. It was one thing in our relationship he couldn't tolerate. He hated knowing I wouldn't give in to his wishes with a well placed smile like the other woman in his life. I never agreed with him and fought him tooth and nail night and day. He hated not being able to control me.

Maybe that is another reason he needed me around. Maybe he wanted to break me before he set me free? Maybe he liked the challenge? Whatever it was I did not know. All I know is I need to get out of here before he wins and I cannot allow this to happen. One man controling my life was enough for me. It had taken me so long to free myself from Sam and I did want to have to do the same thing with the bloodsucker.

Cold fingers wrapped around my wrist. The parasite had his body so close he was touching me and I did not like it. "Try me."

"You have a child who needs a father. A wife who needs a husband. You can't stand there and tell me you'd leave them to live in a forever without you? Come on leech I am smarter than you seem to think. Your much to _heroic _to pull such a gutsy move." Tugging on my arm I tried to get away from him. I needed to leave and I needed to leave now.

The mind reading vampire continued to stare at me long and hard. His grip on my wrist never wavering. "Bella and Nessie would be fine without me. They have Jacob after all. I know they would feel sad for a while but they would move on."

I countered. "So can you once I leave. You'll forget all about me."

He shook his head while his fingers tightened around my arm. I flinched because it actually became painful. "No Leah I could never forget about you. I am being one hundred percent serious. You leave me and I _will _go to the Volturi asking them to kill me. I'll provoke them if I have to."

I jerked my head away when he tried to cup his hand under my jaw. "You need to decided Leah Clearwater if you are strong enough to go on knowing you took a girl's father from her. Nessie will want to know why I would leave her. What should I tell her in the note I will be leaving behind?"

Damn him. Damn him to hell! This isn't fair! "Life never is." He spoke answering my thoughts and I growled once warning him to shut the fuck up. He knew exactly how to play on my weaknesses. He knew I would never want Renesmee to be without a dad. I knew how it felt and the kind of pain it brought.

Like I said before, I do not like Nessie in fact I hate her. Still, if Edward killed himself because of my leaving him it would eat me up knowing I had ruined the half things happy little home. A peice of my heart shattered when I came to the realization I wouldn't be leaving. I would stay here in hell with him.

What choice did I have? I knew he would go through with his plans if I dared to leave. I already caused trouble for everyone I didn't want to cause more. I would suffer so everyone could be happy. I was used to it by now. Who needed happiness anyways? The idea of happiness was overrated anyways.

I felt tears well up in my eyes. This would be my fate from now on. The knowledge killed me inside. I felt cold arms wrap around me and cold lips on my face. For once the cold did not concern me. It matched my soul.

"Shhh Leah. It is going to be ok. I can make you happy. I will make you happy if you let me. Let me take care of you. Let me love you." As he pulled me deeper into his cottage I knew he could make me happy for a little while. It wouldn't last but again a little was better than nothing at all.

THE END!

**AN: So that is the end of this two shot. I hope you all enjoyed it! I may do a sequel in the future but I haven't decided. I know alot of you are probably like why didn't she just get up and leave? Well Leah can be cold but I don't think she would ever want to take someone's father from them. He gave her no choice.**

**Anyways please R&R like always!**


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